april fools

last sunday i was awoken to the sound of my cell phone ringing. wondering who in the world would call me at such an early hour (8:05 am) i picked up only to hear my father ask me to do him a favour. being the kind hearted son i am, i was completely up to the challenge at hand. he told me that he and and my mother were at a tim hortons near my house and that they had some how gotten a flat tire and they needed me to call my sister and tell her to drive over and give them a hand of some sort. so in an act of loving service i did what my father asked and called my sister. it seems that she was also sleeping at this early hour of the morning and picked up the phone with a raspy voice wondering why in the world i would be calling. i told her the sad story about our parents miss fortune and she regretted to tell me that she was actually out of town for the weekend. now i was stuck between a rock and hard place because my parents, it seemed, were expecting my sister to rescue them from their unfortunate circumstances, but she wouldn't be able to come through. my parents also didn't have have a cell phone so i had no way of getting a hold of them, so i reverted to my most trusted and loyal neighbour, christian. i called him and he surprisingly had already been awake and said that he was feeling a little sick, but could hear the distress in my apparent desire to rescue my parents from their toil, so sick christian told me that he would be ready in five minutes and we would be off to the rescue - operation save my parents. i put a nice pair jogging pants on, a hoodie, and the first pair of socks i could find, i went to the bathroom then was ready to set out on my mission. determined to save my parents i walked into the living on my way to the front door, only to see my mother sitting on the couch with an enormous grin on her face. confused as to what excatcly was going on i looked at her with. and she started laughing at me like as if i was the biggest sucker in the world and said "APRIL FOOLS!" this is a true story i did not make this up.

new years resolutions

being that it is the first day of the year two thousand and seven, i think it is only fitting that i make some new years resolutions. but new years resolutions are very interesting things. they are rules that one gives themselves with the intention of breaking. so i should throw some out there that are good ideas and things i wish i did do but will never do. (disclaimer: none of these things i actually plan on doing, if someone feels they want to hold me accountable for them, realise that i do not plan on doing these things) first - i will write a blog once a week for the entire year. second - i will quit smoking (i don't smoke so i don't know how to go about quiting because i don't want to start to quit, i really just wanted to put that in there because it is the most common new years resolution). third - i will never be late for class. forth - i will eat three square meals a day. fifth - i will be less cynical towards establishments like the postal office, food basics, coca cola, and people who wear belts that don't match their shoes. sixth - i will stop buying baseball hats. seventh - i will learn how to use proper grammar and spelling for my blogs. this is my goal for two thousand and seven. looking back at two thousand and six, it was the first year of my blog, for all of you who have shared with me in the highs and low of the blog, thank you. happy new year

jacob two two

i was surfing the internet this christmas eve afternoon (that doesn't make sense) and i ran my mouse over an advertisement and then all of a sudden like parent teasing there child while playing peek-a-boo the advertisement covered the whole site so that i could not read about the world of sports. there was two things wrong with this. first of all ,i've never taken any business courses and i've never been to advertising school, but if i was making an advertisement on a web site, i wouldn't have it so that it pisses the person who's at the site off. i would put the advertisement in a place where it wasn't in the way but still noticeable, either the banner or even on the side isn't a bad location. with that being said if someone is willing to pay me money i would put advertisements on my blog. secondly the particular advertisement was for the post office. why does the post office need to advertise? there's only one post office. i wonder if the consistent rise in stamp cost is paying for all there advertising? on the subject of advertising, there is a commercial which really bugs me. the coke commercial with the polar bears and the penguins, its really silly. penguins couldn't be farther away in there natural habitat from polar bears. they're about as far away from each other as china is to ottawa. do the people at cocacola really think that everyone is that stupid? i think that coke had a good thing going with just the polar bears, why did they have to throw in the penguins. coke don't change what works.

deion sanders

(if you can tell me why i titled this post dion sanders i will think highly of you) blogspot now has spell check, God bless google for taking over and giving it spell check.
i'm in toronto right now because i have a week and a half between my last class, which was this morning, and my first exam, which is on the thirteenth and my dad asked me if i wanted to go with him to toronto for a business trip, so i came. i was lying in bed in the delta toronto east hotel on the second floor room 221 and i couldn't sleep, so i figured since it cost $9.95 for 24 hours of internet i might as well use as much web time as i can, so i'm writing on my beloved blog.
the other day my mother and i were in the new food basics near my house. food basics is much like no frills living by the same penny pinching principles, in fact i'm pretty sure that no frills copied food basics. but food basics shouldn't be called food basics, that would be false advertisement. it should be called food-hygiene-drugs-clothes basics. they have a pharmacy in it. how does that work i wonder, do you have to pay five cents for a bag for your tylenol three? or is it less for the little pharmacy bags because you get less plastic? or is it more because the little pharmacy bags are not as popular? but more so, what i don't understand is how come they sell clothes -- since when is clothes a basic to food? you need to be healthy to enjoy food so i guess drugs and hygiene products can squeeze in the title if we are generous -- but clothes? that's borderline criminal. last i checked i didn't need to be wearing pants to sense the savory superness of kraft dinner and i didn't need to have a t-shirt on to appreciate the colourful excitement of fruit loops. clothes are not basic to food, which is why i don't understand how food basics gets away with selling clothes. feeling confused about the whole thing (because i am a man of common sense) i asked the store manager if he could justify the selling of clothes in food basics and he said that he was wondering the same thing. he told me that he had asked corporate why and they said that they would post an official explanation to how they justify the selling clothes while still keeping the store name food basics.

the big two oh

i'm back. i don't know how often i will post on my blog again but i will make sure to keep people posted about my posts on msn and maybe even facebook. for those of you who care i will fill you in on my life since last may: the summer was crazy. at the end of the summer i decided not to go back to klbc but to go to university, since it was so late i became a special student at ottawa u and carleton (i'm sorry for the boring details). i'm taking english, this is in hopes that some day i will learn how to spell and how to use grammar properly, i don't think that is going to happen anytime soon so bare with me for now grammar and spelling hounds. its two forty four in the am right now, i think the fact that it is so late is why i'm starting the blog again. i can't sleep because i feel so bad about not posting for months (that is a lie). here are a few things i've noticed since moving back home: i eat just as much kraft dinner, i go to bed earlier, i spend less time on school work, i watch a lot more tv, i play a lot more hockey and i spend a lot more money. none of these things are exciting i know, although the kraft dinner really took me by surprise, thanks mom, i feel that i need to get warmed up so that i can have entertaining blogs again, this is just an intro to things that may come in the future. faithul readers, i'm sorry for my lack of posting. i know there's really no way to say i'm sorry but hopefully you can just accept - i'm sorry. till the next time, my name is matt and i'm listening to foo fighters - my hero.

the cardinal number equal to 18 + 1

today, while i was eating a ham sandwich, sitting on the third floor of the construction site i am currently working at, i saw a man maybe in his early thirties wearing a french-like hat and had a moustache, walk into a parking meter. he was pretty short too, so the meter smoked him in the chin. he was actually in a lot of pain, then a lady, who looked to be in her mid to late forties walked by and laughed at him. true story. i did not make that up. that was not baloni. i did though make up the story i told about billybob newmarket. none of it was true. well some of it was true but most of it was not. i'm sorry, it didn't happen. for those looking up billybob newmarket on 411.ca i'm sorry that you haven't found him. and that i have led you down a path that was all for not. since i can't live with telling untrue information, what actually happend was this: i was sitting on the three like i always do minding my own buisness, then i feel asleep. i dreamed my encounter with billybob and woke up thinking that would make a great blog. so i wrote about it. for those of you wondering, in my dream billybob knew my name because i had my name written with a sharpie on my lunch box.

age of majority in quebec

yes, my blog is now eighteen, i can't believe it's all grown up. established. matured. accomplished. but this post will have nothing to do with being eighteen, the sens losing, me working, or belts. this weblog is fully dedicated to the one and only billybob newmarket (if there is another one i am sorry). i met billybob about three hours and eighteen minutes ago, but already he has taken a special place in my heart. i was sitting on the three (a local bus) as i always do on my way home from work, with my massive lunch box and my tool box, hoping that a cute girl would sit next to me. but today no cute girl sat next to me (three days ago a cute girl sat next to me). but a man who looked to be maybe in his early fourties sat next to me, i had never met him before, he sat down and we made typical awkward bus eye contact, and i turned and looked out with window and kept listening to my music, (gorliaz- feel good inc. for those keeping score), he nudged me and asked me, " are you the matthieu foreman who has a blog named the basement and used to be named the oval office?" i said, "yes i am." a little taken back. then he went on to tell me that he loves my blog and is a little upset at me because i haven't posted in over a week. so i told him that i will write a blog tonight, all about our encounter, i got his name and he said that he didn't mind the lack of editing. so billybob newmarket this one's for you.